Day 6 and the beat of the drum

Which talent would you most like to have?

I started out today’s entry with a rant about how nail polish companies keep putting out these “specialty finish” nail polishes (the one I am currently wearing is “matte velvet”) but don’t put out a corresponding top coat to keep the polish where it belongs so it chips off within a couple of days…. That was a terribly long sentence but the point was that that was as far as I got before I lost interest and if I lost interest, you lovely people would too.

So, we are returning to Proust and his list of questions for today’s entry.

I am torn between two answers here.

My first is writing.

I know. I am a writer. I write things all the time. I’ve been writing since I was six years old. But I’d really like to take one (or two or six) of my dozen unfinished novel ideas and …well… finish them.

I’m not sure if that alone qualifies as a talent or not but it’s definitely something I would like to accomplish with the talent I already have?

The second is to create and perform music.

I sing. Like, all the time. Sometimes well, other times not as well. But I have never really had the ability to create music and I failed miserably at my attempts to play musical instruments.

I played the trumpet for a year in middle school. I wasn’t terrible…so long as I got the music ahead of time and drew in the spots to indicate which valves to push to make which sounds. No, really. I couldn’t even get by writing in the notes. I had to draw pictures. Reading music with actual notes on it was not my strong suit.

Before and after the trumpet, I played the drums. Yep. I was a chick drummer. If someone had told me that I’d grow up to live in a world where chick drummers were considered super cool and that I, too, could one day be super cool…

No, I probably still wouldn’t have stuck with it.

As with so many things in my life, I was technically proficient. I could play circles around the rhythms on the page. I really never even had any trouble with sight reading. But when it came to what makes a drummer (or percussionist, depending on how you look at it) better than good (or “meh, decent”) – the fluidity, artistry… not being wound tighter than a two-day clock, which I am, most of the time – I was severely lacking.

I don’t know how many times (not just playing drums but other things too) someone has told me I can’t stay as stiff and rigid as I am and still be able to do whatever it is I am trying to do.

Maybe my real answer to this question should be the talent to loosen up and not be wound quite as tightly as I am…


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